Aadishri taught – Seven rules to be happy
For his disciples Aadishri Arun taught to following Seven rules to be happy :
- All people have good and bad qualities. It is better to look at the good qualities of a person than his bad qualities. It is a normal human tendency to look at the negative qualities of another person rather than his positive qualities. But those people, who look at the positive qualities of others, are happier people. Not only must you look at the positive qualities of a person, you must also look at the positive things in every situation you face in life. For example, if you are not selected for a job interview, then rather than feel depressed, you can think that God has kept an even better job for you and you will get it sooner or later. People may say that ‘whatever happens happens for good only’ but they rarely believe it when times are bad. It is not easy to see the good in other people and to do that you must ask the specific question-What is good in that person? When you ask that question, believe me, you will find many positive qualities in that person who earlier you thought badly off.
- The people who want to be happy must learn to forgive others. When you forgive, you also forget and that reduces the burden of negative emotions that you carry. The people who remain happy don’t take to heart the small problems of life. They know how to forgive, not only others but themselves as well. Happy people have no ego issues and don’t have a problem asking for forgiveness from others if they have hurt others. They have realized that Ego is worthless and it sets the wrong balance in life. They have no problem saying sorry.
- Those who want to remain happy must develop a strong social support system around themselves. There are two pillars to that support system-family and friends. Family and friends have a very big contribution to the state of happiness of a person. You may well have wealth and status but if you don’t have family and friends to share it with then you will not be able to remain happy for long. Therefore as much as possible, make your relations with friends and family good. Wishing them on their birthday; giving genuine compliments; meeting them with a smile on your face; meet them with warmth-all this makes your relationships strong. If you do this, then this is what you will get in return as well and this will make you peaceful and happy. All those who want to be really happy in life should follow this one basic advice.
- Those who want to be happy must do work which appeals to them and do it with their full attention. Most people are not fortunate enough to do that work that suits their mentality. The reason is that when most people start their careers, they don’t have much idea about what they suited for. But if you find yourself doing a job that you don’t like, still pour your heart and mind in it. You will discover that you will get good at it and you will be happy.
- Those who want to be happy must learn not to give too much importance to their thoughts that flit in and out of their minds. On an average 60000 thoughts cross the mind of the average person every day and most of these thoughts are negative. If you start paying attention to these negative thoughts then it will be difficult-nay very difficult to ever be happy. What you should do when you find negative thoughts coming is to ignore them and not start dwelling on them. You should tell yourself-what if what I am thinking doesn’t come true? And even if is true then what I am thinking of as bad for me, may actually be good for me? This counter thought will create peace. There is biology behind what I am saying. Negative thoughts- worry and fear- that cause certain chemicals such as adrenalin to be released in your body and that raises your blood pressure and puts pressure on all your organs while positive thoughts do the opposite.
- To be happy, one has to associate one’s life with a higher cause-a higher purpose. Once a lady saw three laborers carrying bricks at a construction site. She asked the first laborer about what was he doing. He replied rather rudely-‘Can’t you see that I am carrying bricks?’ She then asked the second laborer, “What are you doing? He replied, “I am working so that I can earn money to feed myself and my family.’ Then she asked the third laborer about what he was doing. His reply? ‘I am working on a building that is going to be a biggest and most opulent temple of this town.’ The reader can guess for himself which person would be the happiest of the three and doing the best job.
- Those who want to be happy must take responsibility for their life and their actions. They should not be in victim mode or in a reactive mode. They should believe in changing their life by their own actions. If something bad happens, they don’t blame others. For example such people-if they are late for office, they don’t blame the traffic, they instead plan to leave earlier next time. Happy people may give the credit of their success to others but never the blame for their failure. Those who blame others for their problems and failures only get angry and those who put the onus on themselves may initially get a bit disheartened, but they soon get to working things out so that failure can be turned to success next time around. This results in their energies being well spent-not in blaming others but in improving themselves. Since the power to change things comes from this kind of attitude that person remains in command of his life and is therefore happy.